I recently moved in with my boyfriend. I have a 9 month old persian cat who is fearless and warm. He has a 4 year old mutt who is cold and private. His cat is having a very hard time adjusting. For the first week she stayed under our bed, didn't eat, drink or poop. Now in our ending second week - she still hasn't pooped and is barely eating.
I thought she would get friendlier but instead I feel that she is becoming more bitter as days go by. I am finding it hard to like her because of her behavior. My cat, also female is just as happy as ever - tries to play but isn't getting any feedback. Any advice?
Of course, your boyfriend's cat is bitter. She has been the queen of the roost for a long time and all of a sudden a new cat has been thrust into her domain, along with a woman who considers her a "cold and private mutt."
Introducing a new cat to an existing one in a household should be a slow process, with caring attention given to both cats. Ideally, they should be kept separate from each other, for several days, with a door between them so they can sniff each other through the crack and become accustomed to the scent of a "stranger."
However, since they're already been introduced, the best advice I can give is to give the older female her own private space where she can feel secure and inviolate; a separate room, if possible. She should have her own food and water dishes and her own litterbox, and your boyfriend should give her plenty of loving attention so that she knows she hasn't been totally displaced in his affections. It would also help if you try to gain her trust, as well. Don't try to rush her, but let her come to you.
The situation is exascerbated because she is an adult female, and it is very normal for female cats to be jealous of other females. She may never be best friends with your Persian, but given care and patience, may someday be able to coexist with her.
In the meantime, I'd suggest your boyfriend have a veterinarian take a look at his girl. If she in fact has not eaten or defecated for two weeks, she could have serious physical problems.
