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Feng Shui for Cats

How to live in harmony with nature and your humans

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Feng Shui for Cats

Jenny Contemplating the Meaning of Life

Photo Credit: © Franny Syufy
Jenny is my most recent rescue, and temporarily shares the master bedroom with me until we've worked out some disharmony problems with our alpha male cat, Jaspurr. Several years ago, I decided to implement a bit of oriental philosophy, and came up with Feng Shui for Cats for the benefit of our Bubba, then the master of our domain. The concept of Feng Shui, I learned, is to live in a balanced environment, to attain spiritual harmony with oneself and others around us, so it sounds made to order for Jenny and Jaspurr.

Ch'i: Life Force

Ch'i is life force and is good when encouraged to flow evenly throughout the house. SHA, which we decided must be Bad Ch'i, delivers adversity and misfortune, it is said. Upon contemplation, Jenny is convinced that SHA must be responsible for hairballs and Jaspurr. Bad SHA!

Maximizing Energy

Developing good Feng Shui seems to be a matter of maximizing energy, which Jenny endorses wholeheartedly. It is no wonder then, that the placement of one's bed is of vital importance for attaining the goal of maximized energy. There are several rules for bed placement that seem to have been designed specifically for cats:

  • Never place your bed under a window, as your Ch'i might escape while you sleep, and Ch'i is best kept circulating through the house rather than rushing in and out the window.
  • Don't place your bed between two doors. Bad SHA might rush in through one door, envelope you, and then rush out the other (to say nothing of d*gs and strange cats).
  • Never allow your bed to be right next to a bathroom wall nor directly below a toilet. Bad yin energy from the toilet can cause loss of health and wealth and all kinds of other catastrophes. (We're not entirely sure what yin energy is, but think it might be related to SHA.) Nonetheless, bad is bad.
  • Don't let your bed be in a direct line with the door. It will allow all your energy and good luck to drain out through the door, along with your favorite toys and any hidden treats you've stashed away.

Wind and Water

Simply put, cats love neither, but since Feng Shui is sometimes translated as Wind and Water, Jenny will accept it for the sake of her spiritual harmony. Actually, Jenny likes water well enough if it is flowing from her automatic fountain, but she'll take her wind from the inside looking out, thankyouverymuch.

Bad Feng Shui

There is a lot more to learn about Feng Shui. (One article said a very smart student, studying extensively for twenty years, might reach the first level of understanding.) We learned just enough to know that there is also a lot of bad Feng Shui, along with bad Ch'i, and shelves, mirrors and sharp corners all have a part in it. For that reason, we will try avoid all of those, although Jenny loves to climb on the shelves that contain books and multimedia.

Frankly, all this study made us very sleepy, so we're going to take a nap on our bed. By the way, the bed is between two windows, right next to the bathroom wall, and points directly to the fireplace, which has got to be bad Ch'i all around. We're going to cuddle, though, so that our positive energy will flow back and forth between us, SHA be damned.

It may come as no surprise to you that Jenny and I really don't know anything about Feng Shui, but we've enjoyed this little exercise and hope you did too, and that you won't report us to the Bad Feng Shui cops.

Good Ch'i to you and yours!

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